Monday, March 31, 2008

Back in business.

First day back at The Little Company That Could. It rained and was cold, so the store was empty, and I spent all day learning the company values by rote. Going to help one last time with shipment tomorrow at Big Box, and then I'm bouncing, happily.

--absolutely nothing of interest to write about, and completely free of reflection. So this is a quick entry to try and get back in the habit of writing.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Kindness of Strangers.

We got a new TV! And my laptop decided to like me again. Which is my excuse for not posting last night--my laptop decided the internet didn't exist. Which, technically it doesn't, because we don't have it hooked up and I steal from my neighbors. I have become tired of depending on their generosity, though, and also of getting kicked on and off, and not having cable, so I let Comcast suck my soul and we'll have interwebs starting on Wednesday.

This afternoon we hauled in this massive TV on our own; it must've weighed a million pounds. We got to about twenty feet away from our apartment and had to put it down--our fingers were going numb. Right at that moment one of our neighbors came out, this huge, ripped bodybuilder. He then proceeded to carry the TV in for us, then caught Amanda in the hall a few minutes later and asked her to let him know if we needed anything else.

Today was my last day at Big Box, aside from a couple of hours on Tuesday. I handed over my keys and left the building grinning like an idiot and squinting into the sun.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Little bit inconsistent.

Must get better at this blogging business. You wouldn't think it would be so difficult to set aside a few moments to blather on about your day, but I log on and stare at the page for a while before just...giving up. So. It's going to be boring, but I have a resolution to write at least a paragraph every night.

Here's today: Saturday is my last day at Big Box. I am going back to The Little Company That Could. It was a promotion, a raise, and a relief. The work/life balance is something that larger companies just do not understand, and this tiny place really gets that. Definitely some bittersweetness to this, I will really miss my team. I love a lot of the people there. Getting up at four is killing me, and I miss having a life. I've barely been into the city in the past eight months and the thought of going into the spring, spending all my time indoors but what it takes me to walk back and forth from the metro stations...I couldn't stand it. I barely see Leila; I don't have time to travel. I'm tired and the job is stressful. Monday lands me back in granola-land, of soy fabrics and yoga classes, and golf pros who work part time there "because [they] like it so much."

In the vein of returning to the healthy store I am trying to return to the healthy life. I haven't run all winter due to the cold and also--four in the morning?! I'd like to see you get up earlier than that to run! So starting Tuesday I'll run every other day, and Amanda claims she'll run also. We will see about that, of course.

Meh. Feel like I can't hit the right tone here. In summation: will write a paragraph or more every night, will run starting Tuesday. Will not stress over these last two days at Big Box. Will be proud of myself for getting the job at The Little Company that Could.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Justice. Mercy. Hope.

Jenna would've been 23 today. You can see in my sidebar a link to the site Justice for Jenna. You can read her story, and understand what her family (including my friend J) are going through, have been going through.
You will probably cry if you think about it too much, I know I did.
I've been trying to be honest, in all of my life, instead of hiding things under my skin, like I am so prone to doing. So in light of that, instead of blathering on about the situation, I want to post some prayers I wrote in the first few days, and get those thoughts out there again...some kind of karma, directed and Jenna's family, during this tough week.
I don't pray very often, so I started writing things down because I thought it would be easier...

Prayers for Jenna:
Godspeed
May Angels unable to protect you
lead you home with gentle hands
may you hold your unseen child
in loving arms, for all eternity
May your family know swift healing
and may prayers lift them from their grief
and finally: may you have felt no pain, no fear
may you have been blissfully ignorant
and your last waking thoughts of love.

Prayers for Jason:
God help you.
May you retain your faith
May you know the love of friends and family
the support of communities behind you
May the tears shed by your eyes
Open them to the tragedies of others
May empathy rule your emotions
for the remainder of your days
may you know love, Jason
and carry these scars as a badge
a reminder of loss,
a reminder of faith
a reminder of her.
May you be lifted by this prayer , and the other prayers
said by so many, always caring--


The day after the news came about, I wrote this as an addendum:

May the strength that has gotten you through this far stand you in good stead.May our prayers sustain you further. May you cling to the shreds of peace God is still providing.
And may love surround you. Always, always.